The word codependency is thrown around quite a bit in the recovery world. Drugs and alcohol cause codependent behaviors for both the person who is suffering from addiction and the people who are affected by it. The problem of being influenced by codependency is that you may not even comprehend what being codependent means or realize that you are part of that vicious cycle at all.
Codependency is defined as “excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner, typically one who requires support on account of an illness or addiction.” When someone is battling drug and alcohol abuse, plain and simple, they may need monetary, emotional, or physical support to keep their habit going. Their loved ones will enable their addiction to keep the peace. Rather than let them hit their bottom, they will help them from developing withdrawals, keeping them out jail, or covering for them in any way that keeps their consequences from getting any higher. Basically, the person with the addiction will take whatever they can to keep up their drug and alcohol use and their friends and loved ones will step in to stop any of their anguish.
The good news is that you can go from being codependent to becoming self-sufficient at any time you chose. Enabling one another can become brutal and unhealthy for everyone involved. Changing up the dynamics will not be easy but is certainly doable by tweaking a few things.
Get some help
Whether you are the person with the addiction or the person enabling it, getting help to stop your behavior is the best way to venture through this uncomfortable situation. 12-Step programs like Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Al-Anon, or CODA are all useful to gain the knowledge of the tools you need to stop the cycle of codependency while giving the support needed to implement what has been learned.
Change your behavior
Discerning what to do about codependency and putting your tools into action are two entirely different things. In order to change, you must keep trying to alter your behavior instead of worrying about someone else’s. You will feel better and stronger about taking this crucial step to stop the codependency by getting into action and deciding that this toxicity must end right now.
When you get into enough pain you will change and it may take you a while to get there, but that it is okay. Strive for self-sufficiency and staying in your own lane today because there is no time like the present.
Offering a full range of recovery and mental health services, Detox Center of Colorado offers “Expanded Recovery” to enrich our clients’ lives in mind, body, and spirit. Through evidence-based therapy options and the endless adventure of Colorado, Detox Center of Colorado fosters connection, encouraging clients to get connected to themselves, their peers, their families, and their higher power. With the power of recovery, clients are restored to full health and experience life-changing healing. Call us today for more information: 303-536-5463
